Everman
by Somber Secrets
Summary: Look up on the horizon! It's an idiot! It's a fairy queen! No its… EverMan? If there was one thing that Evergreen thought she would never do, it was warm up to the term "EverMan"… then again hadn't she also sworn not to fall in love with said Man?


EverMan

Summary: Look up on the horizon! It's an idiot! It's a fairy queen! No its… EverMan? If there was one thing that Evergreen thought she would never do, it was warm up to the term "EverMan"… then again hadn't she also sworn not to fall in love with said Man?

Disclaimer: I don't own what I don't own

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Evergreen had always heard them. As far as she was concerned, those types of terms had been around since the very beginning of time. None of them referred to her though, so she didn't particularly care.

Caring didn't become a factor anymore after the events of Fantasia though. Being in the guild every single day and having to spend time about the demon Mirajane mean that you had to hear of these kinds of things. One of the things that had never changed about the demon was how big of a mouth that girl had. Granted they were used in totally different ways now… but for the forces of evil none the less.

At first it hadn't really even registered in Evergreen's brain. She just wondered who the hell Gavy and Gruvia and Nacy were. She was sure that she had never heard of these people joining the guild much less having actually seen them roam around in the large tavern. Granted there were a lot of people roaming around in the guild, but that was beside the point. And more than that, maybe they were barely there members too.

And then the S-Class exam selection had passed and suddenly she had paired herself up with that stupid excuse of a man because her stupid excuses for teammates had betrayed her and if it was the last thing she did she would turn them into stone for being such insolent...

Moving on.

They had only one week before their journey to Tenrou Island to get to know each other and train, but already Evergreen knew that something was changing. Sure the talk about Gavy had grown to some crazy epic proportions and all, but now there was a new person. Some idiot named Everman.

Who the hell would name their child Everman? It was even worse than something like Elfman!

And then Evergreen realized what was going on and wanted to hit herself hard with anything, anything at all. How could she have not have realized sooner?

And then the second thing hit her. Eww… who the hell had just paired her up with that idiot of a Take Over mage?

Evergreen had turned her eyes to Mirajane who actually seemed to be innocent in that respect. Odd.

Now that Evergreen had been enlightened about the situation she was almost sure that Mirajane had created all the other names… so who was it that decided that Everman was a good idea? She would be sure to seek them out and destroy them the moment she found out.

Her whole entire thought process during that one week had probably been the reason why Evergreen had turned to such drastic and unprejudiced measures during their first test on Tenrou Island. Hey… if it was already out there, why not use it to her advantage? After all, you would have to be a dolt to think that it was true.

Evergreen, queen of fairies, falling in love with a man like Elfman? No. That was insane. Only an idiot would fall in love with another idiot.

Not such an insane thought by the time they had gotten off Tenrou Island though. Granted, to the rest of the world seven years had passed and seven years was anything but a little bit of time, but for Evergreen, it had only seemed like a day.

She wanted to curse herself. A day? Seriously? That was absurd. She was not an idiot by any means. So she didn't accept that fact at all and continued to ignore it. Like ignoring things ever made them go away. How easy life would be if that one small fact was true.

It was hard ignoring it though when she would inadvertently turn red when ever Everman was mentioned or Mirajane would look at her and her brother with those horrified eyes.

Evergreen didn't understand what Mirajane's issue was. She was sure that a kid between her and Elfman would be sickeningly adorable. Had she just thought that? Had she actually? No… no way.

Ignoring it… was not working.

Evergreen had to acknowledge this when she started screaming Elfman's name during the Magical games when he had been pitted against that drunk idiot Bacchus. She had even gone as far as to comfort Lisanna who had not only her brother to worry about but her chastity as well. Elfman would obviously win, any man that she was in love with always had to win. Evergreen blanched… what had she just…

It was no use ignoring it anymore.

No use at all.

Because she had been the first one in the ward when they had carried Elfman in after the battle and she had been the one to shove the box under his feet because the bed was too short. She had been the one to wrap his bandages as the others had carried on in their conversations and their teasing and their congratulation and Evergreen was not the type to bloody cry!

So why did she want to when Elfman would still give her that stupid idiot grin when he was lying there barely even able to move.

Stupid man.

Stupid, stupid loveable man.

She had to leave the room. Lisanna took her place easily, knowing that Evergreen needed the space.

When she had come back in, Elfman had for some reason unbeknownst to her, figured out just how shaken she had gotten from his condition. Even then Evergreen was sure that she was keeping a pretty straight face. "I'm… sorry…"

"Hmph, couldn't you have come up with a more direct battle strategy?" she resisted calling him on idiot. She hadn't really even meant for the teasing, slightly snide comment to slip out. It had been built as part of her 'just ignore it' defence.

"C'mon the injured should be sleeping…"

"Should we let Ever sleep with you?" Bickslow had teased as he pushed Evergreen closer to Elfman.

"Stop messing around!" Evergreen froze. It hadn't just been her voice that had said that. She couldn't stop the hurt blooming in her chest when she looked down at Elfman to see that he was still trying to scowl at her two teammates even with his heavy bandages still on.

"We'll guard the outside. Stay in here Ever," Fried stated kindly as he grabbed Bickslow's arm and dragged the still laughing man out of the room.

Evergreen let out a large sigh as she dropped into her seat and rested her head against the mattress. "Stupid Bickslow," Evergreen muttered, trying to get her mind off of the fact that Elfman didn't like her as much as she pretended not to like him.

Suddenly she felt something warm poke her hand. She looked up to watch Elfman's hand wind around hers and hold it tightly. "Hey… stay with me okay?" Elfman grunted.

Evergreen blinked slowly, all the hurt from a moment before disappearing. "Well that was Fried's order and what I promised the others I would do."

"When did you ever listen to him?" Elfman snorted.

"Hm… just this once."

So Evergreen had stayed. She had stayed everyday in the ward until Elfman had gotten better. And that had been it for the Magical games.

Evergreen ended up also being the one to lug the man back home.

And then it happened.

"Evergreen is not a man!" Elfman shouted as he slammed his fist on the table.

See, to a normal person this would have been an obvious statement. To a Fairy Tail mage, this meant that Evergreen wasn't good enough. And boy did Evergreen take this opinion seriously.

A little bit too seriously.

It had taken Mirajane and Lisanna two days and a Satan Soul to convince Evergreen to remove Elfman from her stony spell and even that was done with much reluctance and a fight that had destroyed half the infrastructure of the guild.

And then Evergreen just stopped coming to the guild.

It wasn't anything new. Before Fantasia she hadn't frequented the guild that much anyways… so now coming was like going back to the usual… there was no other reason than that.

Lies.

She stopped coming because although the word Everman had brought her a stupid amount of joy then, it now brought her some sort of over whelming loathing and sadness. She took out all her frustrations by sneaking into the guild in the middle of the night and stealing quest after quest after quest.

Sometimes Fried and Bickslow would join her.

Sometimes they would ask her to come to the guild already because Elfman hadn't been a man for weeks, but she would turn them into stone, take another quest, leave the city, and then dissolve the spell.

Once in a while Evergreen wanted to smash her teammates into bits, especially Fried because if he had just chosen her instead of Bickslow for Tenrou Island than none of this would never have happened. Evergreen knew that she was being an upset teenage girl. The fact that she had fallen in love with Elfman couldn't be blamed on anyone else but her.

Bickslow and Fried had figured out that it was better to actually not piss off their teammate and go with her flow rather than wonder about her whereabouts for days on end.

It was said to be a miracle that Bickslow and his dolls had been able to keep their mouths shut.

Then one mission, three weeks after Evergreen had decided to try and quit her love cold turkey, Fried and Bickslow had sat her down on a bench in the middle of a small town square and had told her to wait there for them as they went and got… icecream.

Evergreen didn't question it. She sat. After all her teammates had had to deal with her for the past while so she would deal with them and their lame excuses just this once.

Suspicion started rising in her gut though when the square that Fried and Bickslow had left her in starting filling up with a bunch of annoying little kids. She could have sworn that she heard the terms 'idiot' and 'fairy queen' being tossed around, but she was definitely off her rocker for hearing the name 'Everman.'

Evergreen sighed. It was just wishful thinking on her part.

And then her suspicions were suddenly proven valid when a loud whistle resonated through the square and suddenly the kids were lined up in two rows, one to Evergreen's right, the other to her left. They made a neat, clean isle leading from one of the roads directly to the woman.

Evergreen blinked and narrowed her eyes. "No way…"

And then the kids began to chant, though a little bit lamely and broken with soft giggles, "Look up on the horizon! It's an idiot!"

And indeed at the end of the long isle Evergreen made out the silhouette of her idiot.

"It's a fairy queen!"

It was eerie watching all the kids turn toward her although half of them had fallen into fits of laughter.

"It's Everman!"

Evergreen made to bolt.

Elfman had never run so fast in all his life. "You're not a man!" He shouted as he grabbed onto her wrist, squeezed his eyes shut and proceeded to smack her in the face with crudely picked flowers. Smooth Elfman… smooth. "You're my wo...man…"

Evergreen couldn't help it. "What?"

Elfman popped open one eye and sighed in relief when he saw that Evergreen hadn't taken off her spectacles. "You're not a man because you're my wo…man."

"Stop breaking up woman into two pieces like that."

"But you took so much offense when I didn't say you were a man!"

"But that's because…"

Giggling interrupted her. Evergreen looked over Elfman's shoulder to see that the kids had gathered up in a blob behind him and were all listening in to their conversation with wide eyes. Fried and Bickslow had probably promised them all an interesting scene in exchange for their little show… or it would explain why the two had gone for an ice cream run out of all things.

Suddenly Bickslow's puppet zoomed out from the hidden streets and began to corral the kids away. Evergreen twitched… she was going to kill those two when all was said and done.

"That's because what Ever?"

Evergreen blushed, "Don't call me Ever!"

"Why not?" Elfman asked offended.

"Just don't!"

"But if you look this pretty when I call you Ever than I'll call you Ever, ever forever."

Evergreen literally heard Fried smack his forehead. No one had ever said that Elfman was good with words. But then again… hadn't he been a poet when he was younger… maybe he was doing this totally on purpose because seriously… Evergreen felt like a cherry.

"Forever?" Evergreen questioned.

Elfman nodded frantically, "I'll always call you Ever… like a man…"

"Were you the one who made up that lame chant?"

"Uh… was it really that lame? I thought it was manly!"

No… impossible… Elfman's poetic side had totally died… even if the chant did include the fact that she was a fairy queen… which was nice… really nice actually.

"You really think I'm a fairy queen?"

"Yes!" Elfman instantly replied. Evergreen stared at him. If there was one thing that Elfman always was, it was honest. Poetic or not.

Evergreen sighed, "I'm an idiot."

"Huh? I thought I was supposed to be the idiot."

"Only idiots fall in love with idiots."

"Huh…"

"What do you think about Everman?" Evergreen asked wondering how he felt about the nickname for them that would soon be all too true in the guild.

Elfman blushed as he looked away from her. Evergreen narrowed her eyes. "No…"

Elfman coughed.

"It was you?"

Elfman coughed again.

Evergreen blinked and looked toward the ground, "Oh Mavis… I really am the more idiotic of us two… now I can't even destroy the idiot who made up that idiotic name…"

"That's not nice Ever…"

Evergreen looked up at Elfman before she smiled and punched his chest. "Everman huh?"

"I thought it sounded manly. Like a super hero."

"We do make a pretty super team, don't we?"

"Yeah…"

"Well I'll only say this once… but I like it."

Even an idiot as idiotic as Elfman had to know what that meant.

But you know… he had expected all of this since he had made up the name…

So… was Elfman ever an idiot to begin with?

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Super silly... came out of no whereness kind of silly haha. Super corny too... but I couldn't think of any other way for the Superman thing to be said. Pft. But I had to do it... with the chapters that are coming out... like seriously... haha.

I hope you guys liked.

So... what do you guys think? Is Elfman an idiot?


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